Meditation Is Not Easy For Me

I love meditation.  If only I could do it easily.

I advocate for anyone who will listen to do it.  Try it.  Learn how and use it on a regular basis or when you can, create a random moment.

I like it from the concept to the practice.  Meditation in essence is focus, being in the here-and-now, non-judgmental, forgiving, gentle, and above the minutia of routine life.  To have discipline and a sense of priorities all while finding peace and centeredness sounds amazing, right?

I know many people who do this and my clients who have tried are making leaps and bounds in their treatment with me.  I have the hardest time meditating.  So in conclusion, I'm going to keep trying! 10 minutes a day has been my motto.  

I stop what I'm doing and breath for 10 minutes. Counting my breaths 1 to 10 and then I start again.  I set a time for the 10 minutes.  I haven't been able to stay focused for more than a few seconds but I keep going back to the focus.  10 minutes every day.  Now you try.

Response to Out-of-State Question on Negative Thinking

Negative thinking is a way to PROTECT yourself. Figure out what you are protecting yourself from FIRST (https://twitter.com/AnatSamid)

 

After I posted that yesterday, I got the question from North Carolina about an interest in finding a therapist and learning about self from negative thoughts.  I responded...

You can always find someone local. A lot of therapists like me do videoconferencing and phone sessions too. A therapist is great to guide you but you can also take time to look at what was the first thing that came to your mind when you read the comment and also pay attention to what comes up in your body, thoughts and emotions when a negative thought surfaces.

"If I think this negative thought (i.e, nothing ever works for me) then I am protecting myself from experiencing......" (vulnerability, hurt, fear, etc). And then you try to think of the original hurt/emotional trauma. By noticing it you bring it from the unconscious to the conscious. And then you can start challenging it.

It's powerful stuff!

Can You Do It Walking? - "Walk and Talk" Sessions

Therapeutically speaking, movement releases trauma. Movement triggers a surge of endorphins. And movement gets your brain working in ways that can facilitate creativity and reflection.

Clients connecting to their thoughts and emotions is the name of the game.  So whether it's in-office, videoconferencing, phone sessions or even the "Walk and Talk" session, I am open to whatever works and is clinically relevant for each client's individual journey of self-growth.

I believe, the "Walk and Talk" is a fun twist on the Freudian/psychoanalytic technique of expressing yourself without having to look at the therapist.  So you aren't searching for reactions, just emoting.  

After an initial in-office session, we start thinking outside the box. 

Check out this TED talk.

What Qualifies Me As A Therapist - My Professional Journey

I completed my undergraduate degree in Sociology and began working with Court Appointed Special Advocates (CASA) providing administrative support to help children who had been abused and/or neglected. There I learned to keep focus on what matters - people - and then protocols and theories. And to get the job done with no excuses.

In 1997, I began direct care work as a youth counselor with adolescents living in a group home (Baptist Home).  It was by far the hardest of all my jobs but the one where I learned the most.  Those children taught me more about trauma and strength than any text book ever could.  When on rare occasion I hear back from those kids (who are now in their 30's) there is no greater reward.

I was then recruited to work with an after-school program (Safe Passages) geared toward adolescents with a criminal background.  The aim was to provide them tangible support and resources to stay out of jail.  There I learned that it's all the same human experience.  Those "criminals" were no different than any other child I had worked with previously.  Some of us hurt ourselves and some of us hurt others when we are hurting. And some of us do both.  But the behavior is just the expression not the real problem.  Once safety is established, you start the real work of facing the underlying issues.

After 6 years in the trenches of my clients' violence, addictions, self-injurious behavior, tears and laughter, I went back to school so that I could have more influence in changing the reality for the people I aimed to empower. This time returning to work with Hearts and Homes for Youth as a Psychotherapist connecting to several programs and getting experience with latency age children and adolescents.

In 2004, I moved to CA and learned about the business world.  I went into the unknown and came out of it with broaden horizons.  I connected to a great company (MorseGPS) and as their Director of Operations worked to triple profits in one year solely based on customer care. There I learned that applying skills - dedicated effort, true respect for people, and a curiosity to grow - can apply to worlds that you don't even know you'll encounter.

When I returned to MD, I took a short-term position working with the Jewish Social Service Agency providing services to seniors who lived in their own homes to get the resources they needed to stay there. I learned about life from the people who were reaching the end of theirs and struggling with a different layer to the same human issues - depression, substance abuse, suicidal ideation, etc - and the greatest perspective on how much we all need to be surrounded by meaningful relationships as well as meaningful activities.  

All of my professional years of business and social service experience cumulated in my role as Executive Director of Transition Living Services, Inc.  We provided housing and concrete life skills to youth ages 16-21 with the aim of getting them self-sufficient, educated, focused, and with a vision for their future success as well as practice to build competence in coping with anything this world could throw their way.  I was able to hire the best staff, recruit the best young adults and develop protocols that addressed the systemic (and not just the individual's) barriers to success. When I was invited to present at the CASA trainings, you can understand the full circle experience.

In 2008, I moved and began work in NYC.  I worked with Novadea to provide event management and sponsorship management to hi-tech professional groups.  

In 2011, I got my NJ Social Work license and joined the Institute for Personal Growth as a Psychotherapist. The Institute is nationally renowned for it's LGBTQ community work and sex therapy work since the 1980's.  It was an honor to return to social service with this team.

Today, I run my own practice.  Combining my passion for the growth of people and the understanding of the many challenges that can stifle that growth, I am ready to listen to you and empower you.