He Has Road Rage But I'm The One Feeling Triggered

Commuting with a loved one who has road rage? 

Understanding the other's point of view is important to gain some perspective and to realize that there is no actual threat - just the other's person's issues coming to surface.

But acknowledging that you are being triggered is your cue to go into labeling the experience ("this is really stressful for me"), showing yourself some compassion (with self talk and caring touch like touching the side of your own face gently), and going into calming-the-body techniques.

Stress breathing technique: inhale for a count of four, hold for count of four, exhale for a count of four, hold for a count of four, and repeat the cycle as many times as necessary to bring your pulse rate and blood pressure back to normal levels.

Deep, slow breathes. Focusing on the exhale to release the stress. Hmm-ing quietly to yourself. Distract yourself by doing the multiplication tables in your head. When you get out of the car you literally shake it off. Stop by the bathroom for a mini-timeout and acknowledge what you just went through and let it out by shaking your body.

Consider the option of using earphones in the car and listened to peaceful music whenever he enters a rage for more than a minute. Closing your eyes and "getting out of the car" in your mind might make it easier for you. Might be something worth discussing with him as a strategy when you are both calm.

If your partner is ever open to it, he might want to meet with someone to talk about the stress he is experiencing in his life. It's possible that some of it is being expressed on the road and could use a healthier outlet.

[Written by Anat Samid in response to a question about dealing with road raging romantic partner.]